Today, believe it or not, is Be Positive Day! (Yep, it exists!) I first found out about this day back in February when I was researching positivity as I was launching Positively Present. I was so excited about it that I marked it on my calendar, thinking to myself, "If I still have a blog in July, I'll write about Be Positive Day!" And here I am, five months later, still writing and still working hard to be positive. It's been a long road, but a great one, and I'm pretty sure that my positive attitude about the blog -- as well as my personal development -- has helped me to get where I am right now. That being said, positivity doesn't come easily to me, even now.
As you may or may not know, I've spent most of my life being negative. I lived under a cloud of gloominess -- sarcastically commenting on things I disapproved of, judgmentally curling a lip in disgust at something I didn't like, morbidly sinking into self pity every time something didn't fall into place the way I thought it should. I was getting by -- still functioning, still having my bouts of fun, still experiencing fleeting moments of happiness -- but I wasn't happy. I wasn't at peace with myself or any of the things I was doing. The life I was living was far from positive and I never really saw thinking positively as an option. To me, it was a distant dream, like living in a fabulous penthouse in Manhattan. It was something other people did, something I'd like to do, but, really, was it realistic to think I'd ever experience that in my life?
Positivity was distant, untouchable, a pretty thing far away that I was aware of but wasn't allowed to touch. Or, rather, I was allowed to, but, for whatever reason, didn't think I could. I'd trained myself to believe that positivity wasn't for me, that it was for someone else. I'd believed, really believed, that positivity was something that one was born with. I hadn't been born with it, I believed, and that was that. Case closed. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. I was negative and that was all there was to it. ...Or was there more? The sadder I became, the more destructive I was to myself and to lives of others, the more I began to wonder, "Is this really it? Is this the life I want to be living? Could this be the way I meant to live?" The more I thought and wondered and wrote and read, the more I realized that this couldn't be it. This couldn't be how my life was going to be. I had to make a change.
I don't know when it was, but somewhere near the end of last year, I had an "aha!" moment. I realized that no one was going to change me for me. No one was going to come around with a magic wand and transform my negative attitude into a positive one. No matter what I achieved, no matter who I dated, no matter what I weighed or what I bought, I wasn't going to be happier. Happiness, I somehow uncovered -- a bit late in the game -- was going to have to come from within me. I was going to have to make a change. This was scary. Most of my life, things have come easily to me. I've had to make choices, but I hadn't had to make many changes. What a difference there is between making a choice and making a change. Change -- especially one as important as attitude -- was overwhelming. But I knew I wanted it. I knew I wanted to be happy, to be positive. And, if I'm nothing else, I'm the type of girl who goes after what she wants.
So I did. I went after a positive attitude with a vengeance. I scoured bookstores for everything written about happiness and positivity -- how to get it, where it came from, what it really was. I searched the internet recklessly, clicking on link after link after link, surfing quickly and blindly, each site leading me to more sites (one of those sites being Be Positive Day). I absorbed anything I could find about positivity. The more I read, the more I researched, the more I wanted to be that person -- the person that found the good in things, the person who radiating happiness from within. I wanted it, but I wasn't there yet. Learning about it wasn't going to cut it. I had to do something.
Happiness, I realized, isn't about doing. It's about being. When you are happy, you act happy. You treat others with kindness. You do good things. You motivate yourself and others. Happiness is a state of being, which is why Be Positive Day is so exciting to me. Being positive is the first step to doing almost anything. You want to find a great job? Be positive. You want to be in a loving, nurturing relationship? Be positive. You want to complete a difficult project? Be positive. Being positive is the first step in the right direction (no matter what that direction is). Every day I work on being positive. It's not easy and my efforts are far from perfect, but I'm working on it. And you can too! Take some time to think about how you can be positive today. When you're confronted with difficulties, remember that it's Be Positive Day! Keep smiling, keep looking for the good, and, no matter what you're dealing with it will get better if you have a positive attitude. How do you plan on being positive today? I'd love to hear your thoughts on how you plan to make Be Positive Day a positive day for you!
Need some ideas on how to be positive? Check out the links below!
Just Say No To Negativity
25 Totally Awesome Ways to Boost Your Mood
Things To Make (Other Than Money)
5 Things Happy People Do
How To Give the World a Virus
A Happy List, A Happy You
How To Deal with Stress Positively
Saying No To Negativity is as Easy as ABC(DE)
100 Ways To Live in the Moment
Happy Be Positive Day, PP!!
I've been wondering if your friends and family have noticed a big change in you. And have your friendships been *affected* by your attitude change? Some people bond over negative circumstances -- do any of your friends resent the "new you"? (Just wondering!) ; )
Posted by: kirwin @ Graceful Creative | July 15, 2009 at 10:47 AM
Oh this is so wonderful! Happy positive day! I think this is going to be my new favorite holiday :)
I really feel so great reading this post and I love the "aha" moment you had - indeed our happiness rests within us, we can never find it externally, no matter who or what we have. It is a choice of how we choose to see ourselves and the world.
And the best part is, the happier you are the better and better things get. Life seems like there are always flowers and butterflies around you and all is perfect!
Wishing you thus not just a positive day, but every day to be full of happiness, joy and positivity!
Posted by: Evita | July 15, 2009 at 10:58 AM
Kirwin - Happy Be Positive Day to you too! :) My friends and family have definitely noticed a change in me, though there are certainly times when my old negativity creeps out (especially with my family). I definitely feel that it's hard to bond with certain people with whom I used to talk only about negative stuff, but I've tried to clear my life of people who aren't positive. For the most part, everyone is very supportive and enjoys spending time with the more positive me.
Evita - You too! :) I hope your Be Positive Day is filled with loads of positivity and happiness. As you said, when we're happier the world seems like a better place and that's happening to me more and more every day.
Posted by: positively present | July 15, 2009 at 11:25 AM
Great idea Positively Present,
I used to be just like you used to be. Pessimistic, negative, and maybe even a little depressed with life. Thankfully that has changed since I went to college. I found great new friends who pulled me out of that funk and I'm a happier person for it.
HAPPY POSITIVE DAY!
Posted by: John | July 15, 2009 at 11:47 AM
I think the best people to teach stuff are the ones who had such a debilitating problem with it that they had to learn it themselves. So kudos, and "You go!"
Me, I'm not so much with the naming a day after something thing. But I get that it raises awareness, and I'm totally for that. So...yay for positivity!
Posted by: Colleen Wainwright | July 15, 2009 at 11:50 AM
Love this! Dani, good for you that you had the realization that you are the only one who can change you, that you dove in and that your positivity has persisted! This is a fun post! Thank you for paying if forward--this blog is a beacon for all of us!
Posted by: Jodi at Joy Discovered | July 15, 2009 at 12:08 PM
Happy Be Positive Day! :)
Posted by: Meream | July 15, 2009 at 01:05 PM
John - I'm so glad you can relate. A lot of people have lived their whole lives with a positive mindset and just can't understand how difficult it really is to see things positively. I'm glad to hear that, like me, you've found a way to turn that frown upside down. I hope you have a very positive day! :)
Colleen - That's a great point and I couldn't agree with it more. When something comes naturally to you, it's hard to explain how you do it. For example, I'm a very fast reader and writer and when people ask how I'm so fast I kinda shrug and say, "I dunno?" But when it comes to being positive, that doesn't come naturally to me at all and I can really talk about how I work on it all the time. I'm glad to be raising awareness about positivity because I believe it's something that EVERYONE can benefit from. Thanks for commenting! :)
Jodi - I'm so glad you like the blog and you believe that I'm paying it forward. It's been a long journey for me to get where I am now and I know I still have a quite a way to go, but I'm learning more every day and every day that I focus on the positive is a better day. I'm glad that I realized that it was up to me to make a change and I'm extra glad that I can share my experiences here on PP.
Meream - Happy Be Positive Day to you too! :) I hope you have a day filled with positivity and happiness.
Posted by: positively present | July 15, 2009 at 01:29 PM
Today, I was all psyched to be down in the dumps and now I find out it's be positive day. Sheesh. OK fine ... I'll take a half-full glass of lemonade, with a twist of smile.
Your magic wand example is a reminder that at the end of the day you own your results. Self-reliance is one of the most important skills, and so is emotional intelligence. And that includes owning how you feel.
Good stuff and happy holiday!
Posted by: J.D. Meier | July 15, 2009 at 02:34 PM
J.D. - Hahaha. You cracked me up with your comment! I'm glad you liked what I wrote about the magic wand. As you said, at the end of the day we have to own our actions, thoughts, and feelings. It's not always easy to do that, but it really is up to us to do and think and feel what we want to.
Posted by: positively present | July 15, 2009 at 02:50 PM
HAPPY BE POSITIVE DAY PP!! It's so inspiring to see you've turned your attitude around, especially as it's not easy to do. I can relate - I used to be far more negative than I am now. I still have my days but I can definitely put my hand on my heart and say that I now class myself as a positive, optimistic person.
Keep at it PP - we're loving you for it and you being positive and spreading the positivity makes the world a better place.
Posted by: Sami - Life, Laughs & Lemmings | July 15, 2009 at 04:46 PM
YEA!! What a wonderful day and a wonderful thing to celebrate. Now to make this celebration one that takes place every day!!
I am so glad I found this blog!
Posted by: The Exception | July 15, 2009 at 07:06 PM
Sami - Happy Be Positive Day to YOU! :) Thanks for the support and for letting me know that I'm not alone in my transformation from negative to positive. It's not always easy, but I plan to keep it up!
The Exception - I'm glad you like Be Positive Day! You make a great point about how Be Positive Day should be every day. I'm so glad you found the blog too! :)
Posted by: positively present | July 15, 2009 at 09:10 PM
Happy be positive day!
I must admit that I'm not sure I want to buy into it though... I've had positivity thrust on me, and it of course depends how it's used, but it can be "anti-negative". Or "anti-anti-positive!".
True positivity means welcoming and freeing - even of negative thoughts!
Posted by: Matthew | Polaris Rising | July 16, 2009 at 12:46 AM
Dani, Happy be positive day to you a day late! Your story sounds a lot like mine. I was Mr. negative and sarcastic. Being positive doesn't come easy for me either. But I'm doing much, much better.
I haven't had time to read them all but I've checked out a couple of your linked articles and they look great. Thanks!
Posted by: Stephen Mills | July 16, 2009 at 07:15 AM
Matthew - I totally get what you're saying. I've had my fair share of positivity forced on me and I never liked it one bit. Positivity, for me, doesn't mean completely getting rid of negativity. For me it means learning how to deal with the negative and try the best I can to see it in a more positive light (which doesn't always happen, believe me). I appreciate you commenting and I wish you a very positive day (even if you don't buy into Be Positive Day! haha).
Stephen - So glad you could relate to my story. It's definitely hard to go from being a negative person (which was something people identified with me) to being a positive one. It's not always easy to do it, but practice makes perfect! Thanks for checking out a couple of the other posts. :) I hope you have a very positive day. It can be Be Positive Day anyday!
Posted by: positively present | July 16, 2009 at 08:15 AM
I didn't know there was a Be Positive Day! Thanks so much for sharing and for helping us all to remember to be positive on a daily basis :)
Posted by: Laura Cococcia | July 16, 2009 at 08:23 AM
Laura - You're welcome! I didn't know it either until I came across it online! :) I'm pretty sure it's just a made up thing, but I like it anyway.
Posted by: positively present | July 16, 2009 at 09:34 AM
Hey Dani:)
I like your posts. I think it is easy to get sucked into negativity and complaining, and it takes an effort to be happy, until you make it a habit and then being happy becomes automatic. If that makes sense?
This post reminds me very much of the movie 'The pursuit of happiness' with Will Smith, how he says happiness is something you can achieve just for that tiny moment, and then it disappears again, and you pursue it until you get it again, and so on and so forth.
You know that saying "Happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase is the more it flies away, but turn your attention to the things you love, and it will come and sit right on your shoulder".
I like that saying:)
Have an awesome day!
*Smiles* :)
Diggy
Upgradereality.com
Posted by: Diggy-Upgradereality.com | July 16, 2009 at 04:14 PM
I totally thought you were kidding about Be Positive Day! (It just sounded so...you!)
Thank you for sharing this!
Posted by: Hayden Tompkins | July 16, 2009 at 05:31 PM
Hayden - Your comment made me laugh because if someone had told me a year or so ago that Be Positive Day sounded so "me" I would have died of shock. I guess that's just a good sign that I'm making quite a change in my attitude about life, huh! I suppose Be Positive Day isn't a national holiday or anything, but it isn't completely something I made up. ;)
Posted by: positively present | July 16, 2009 at 06:01 PM
Hi Dani .. great to have a Happy Be Positive Day .. I learnt that sarcasm is not a nice trait to have, or words to use .. I've managed to mainly eliminate it from my life .. it's unfair and not necessary. When I talk to people I always try to look at or for something positive to say .. ie a different approach to the way they're looking at that subject .. and it certainly makes you think out the box and be more positive & in times of sadness that can be hugely helpful to people. A chap lost his wife in the home where my Mum is 13 months ago .. and he emailed me this week saying he remembers our kindness - my Mum too .. Richard would come in and talk to Mum in her bed .. and leave laughing .. it was wonderful to see and lovely for him to acknowledge a year later.
I just look at my Mum as an example .. and think I can't be negative at all .. your last paragraph says it all - be positive, be happy, enjoy life, smile with others, be kind to others .. we'll be happy and positive too ..
Thanks so much - Hilary Melton-Butcher
Positive Letters
Posted by: Hilary | July 17, 2009 at 04:02 AM
Hilary - Sarcasm is definitely needless in our lives. It only brings negativity around. What a lovely story about you receiving word a year later about how kind you and your mother were. That is such a great feeling, isn't it? And a great reminder of why being positive is so much more rewarding than negativity!
Posted by: positively present | July 17, 2009 at 07:18 AM