are your goals fun?

 (♥)
 

Today we have an awesome guest post from life coach Jen, who is the author of the oh-so-wonderful personal development blog, Reach Your Dreams. I'm happy to have Jen here as a guest writer today and I'm sure you'll really enjoy her fun-filled post. 


How often have you created a goal for yourself, and then made it into something that you resent and feel guilty about not doing? We all do this at times. Start off with a fun goal and make it into something else to do, to beat ourselves up with and manage to squeeze all the fun out of it, until eventually it is just another chore! Why do we do that? I don’t have the answer, but I do know I have often done this.  A common victim of mine is exercise (although I think exercise has got a bad name from a lot of people, not just me!J) I actually really enjoy exercise, when I do it (particularly running), but have often made this into a ball and chain around my neck. It’s crazy really. Why don’t we either do whatever it is and enjoy it, or not do it and enjoy not doing it, rather than this mental torture and guilt we put ourselves through! I guarantee you, if you sat down with any group of people, and asked them about exercise, there would definitely be some of what I am talking about in there! 

 

  

 

Be honest

One of the things I have learnt is to be honest with myself about my goals. I used to make goals that I really had no intention of doing…but they sounded good! Or, maybe make some goals that I did have some intention of doing, but really enjoyed spending more time talking about them and doing an elaborate plan! (Hands up who’s done this too!) . The other common scenario, I have found is going from one extreme to another….no exercise …. to a plan to run 10 miles!

 

We are all different

We all have different ways of getting motivated or achieving our goals. I know I am very enthusiastic at the beginning of a new project, but often find I get bored, or want a new stimulus as I get into it. I have found for example with running, entering a race helps me keep focused and carry on towards achieving the goal, even at the times when I don’t feel like it. Some people find a bit of healthy competition with a friend or collaboration helps achieve their goals, whereas others need to let people know what they are doing, to have someone to be accountable too. Find out how you work best.

 

Start off small

I’m not saying not to make your goals big, because there is value in that too, but for example if you haven’t exercised for a year, just doing something, is a great start. Getting started and doing a few small actions, is better than huge plans that scare you off before you have even begun!

 

And finally….have fun!

Life’s too short to be doing things we don’t want to do. If you’re not enjoying a goal you have set yourself, find out, why not? Have you squeezed all the joy out of it? Have a look… if you find you have, stop and re-evaluate why you wanted to do it in the first place. Don’t make the fun things in your life, into more chores. If it’s still not fun, bin it! Take it off the list and replace it with something that is fun! 

How do YOU keep your goals fun?

 

Jen is the author of reachourdreams.com and a Life Coach who blogs all about personal development. If you enjoyed this post, then please consider subscribing to her RSS feed. You can also find Jen on Twitter @reachingdreams.

Comments

[Jen]

Thanks so much for this opportunity Dani! Really delighted to be here. :)

Just to let readers know that my blog address is: www.reachourdreams.com (not www.reachyourdreams.com)

Thanks again.

Jen xox

[Jay Schryer]

Ah, excellent post! I think too many peole get caught up in what they SHOULD be doing, and forget to have fun. Robbing yourself of fun is a sure-fire way to rob yourself of happiness, too.

[Jen]

Thanks Jay! :) It's easily done isn't it? but good to catch yourself... fun and happiness are so important IMO!

[Jason of Kim & Jason]

I think it's always a good idea to try and make sure your goals are fun. One thing is for sure: if a goal requires me to wake up early or NOT eat ice cream, it instantly hits the scrap heap :)

[Henri]

Be honest, follow your passion (i.e. have fun), start small and take action. That's the formula for awesomeness if you ask me. First time reader here at positively present and I bump into Miss Jen. It has been a pleasure, a great post and I'll keep reading :)

[positively present]

Jen - You're welcome! It was a great post and I really appreciate you taking the time to write about this great topic. Sorry about the blog address mix-up. It should be fixed now! :)

Jay - Isn't it a good one? Having fun really is an important part of life and, as you said, so many people forget this (especially around the crazy-busy time of the holidays). We need fun to be happy!

Jason - I agree. Most goals can be turned into fun if looked at the right way -- and it's possible to set goals that work for the lifestyle you want. I think a lot of people forget that they can control what their goals are!

Henri - That's definitely the formula for awesomeness! I'm so glad you came across Positively Present AND that you had a chance to read Jen's post. Thanks for reading and commenting!

[Gordie]

Goals definitely are better and easier to achieve when they're fun. I hope I'm able to make all my future goals fun and therefore giving birth to a deep passion within me.

[WanderingEarl]

Nice post Jen. "If it's still not fun...bin it!" I agree completely. There is no sense in torturing ourselves for no reason. And since we are always learning and changing, we should not feel bad about eliminating a goal that once may have seemed fun but has turned into a chore. It's more important to focus on the goals that we enjoy!

[positively present]

Gordie - I agree! Jen was on to something great with this post. It's a great reminder to me to make sure my goals are enjoyable.

Earl - You're right -- we should have goals that feel like torture! And you bring up a great point about how we change and how sometimes our goals must change for that reason.

[All Women Stalker]

Great post! This really hit home as I have lately been too caught up with bills and stuff to actually focus on fun goals. :)

-meream

[positively present]

Meream - I'm glad you liked Jen's post as much as I did. Hopefully some of the work you have to do will be done soon and you can focus on the fun!

[Lynn]

I really appreciate this one, Dani. It never occurs to me that goals should be fun!

[Laura Lee Bloor]

I agree that most of your goals should be fun. If they're not -- you need to re-evaulate why you're doing them in the first place. Sometimes we tend to add goals that we think will look good or impress others but ultimately just aren't fun to us, so we don't follow through with them.

[Armen Shirvanian]

Hi Jen and Dani.

Some of my goals aren't fun, and those ones are usually very slow to get done, or don't get done. Good point here about them. The ones I have that are actually enjoyable, or enjoyably set up, appear to get done with some effort, or smoothly on their own.

I certainly make some of them too large at first, and it is pretty useless when I do that. It turns out to be a waste of a goal when I set it too large.

A fun goal is a smooth goal.

[Stacey Shipman]

I keep my goals fun by not making goals. I create visions and dreams that I keep in the front of my mind and try, daily, to take steps towards those. I've always been a big dreamer, and when I dream I dream about what I desperately want, making all the steps in between so much fun (most of the time) :-)

[Christine Livingston]

Hey, Jen, nice to visit you in another venue.

Do you know, it has never occurred to me that goals could - and maybe should? - be fun! Your post has set me off thinking about how much lighter life could be if I injected a sense of enjoyment and playfulness into my goals. I think for 2010 I'm going to buy myself a new sketch pad and draw my goals in children's crayons!! How cool is that?! LOL!!!

Thanks so much.

XOX

[Rocky]

making goals fun is so so so important in accomplishing them.

Goals are meant to be fun!

[Catherine]

OK, I guess I am too wrapped up in my goal, and too tired of trying to achieve it to see how to make it fun...
I have to finish a report for my boss. It is really long, and no matter how excited I try to make myself about doing it, I am ready to bin it. However, I cannot until it is finished.
How do you have fun with something that is not fun for you but needs to get done?

[Sami - Life, Laughs & Lemmings]

Most of my goals are fun so it's not too challenging to keep motivated. For the goals that are necessary but not necessarily fun (eg weeding), I focus on how I'll feel when it's done. This seems to help keep me motivated and enjoy the process more.

[positively present]

Lynn - I'm glad you liked this post. Jen did a great job with this one!

Laura - I agree that if we find that our goals aren't fun, we really need to re-evaluate what we're doing. Life's too short not to be having a good time!

Armen - A fun goal is a smooth goal -- I like that! It's so true!

Stacey - What an interesting take on this post! I think you're really on to something by not making goals. Sometimes when you set goals (even fun ones!) you can feel limited by them. Visions and dreams are a great way to go.

Christine - Thanks for coming over to Positively Present to check out Jen's post! I love your idea about drawing your goals in a sketchpad. I recently got an Andy Warhol idea book and I think that sounds like a great idea for it. Thanks!

Rocky - Goals ARE meant to be fun, but so many people forget that. Luckily Jen's created a great reminder for us all in this post!

Catherine - There are definitely things that seem more like work than fun, but I think of those as tasks. Finishing a report for your boss is a task, while, for example, getting promoted would be a goal. A goal should be something fun you're working toward that you really want. At times, you'll encounter things that aren't so fun as you make your way towards a goal, but your goals and dreams should always be fun.

Sami - Great thoughts about how to deal with tasks that don't seem like much fun. I think it's important to have fun goals, but to be able to deal with un-fun tasks.

[Hayden Tompkins]

Every big goal starts off with small steps!

[Jen]

Hello everyone! :)
Thank you for the great comments, I am glad everyone enjoyed this post, and fantastic to meet you all! Such great feedback and insights. Thanks again Dani for letting me drop in!
Love
Jen xxx

[positively present]

Hayden - I agree! Small steps are the way to go!

Jen - There were definitely some great comments on this post and I thank you for writing such an inspiring piece. I'm glad you were able to do this. It was great!

[J.D. Meier]

That's a perfect test -- are your goals fun?

It really cuts to the chase. If they aren't fun, you better find the fun or find some inspiration, or find new goals.

If you have to trade-fun, it should be deeply meaningful.

[Syd]

I keep my goals based in reality and not fantasy. I accept that there are going to be pitfalls and not raise my expectations to the roof. And having steps to take definitely helps.

[Kaushik]

It's essential question that we often forget: is there enough fun and joy and lightness in my life?

Thanks for the great pointer!

k

[positively present]

J.D. - It is a GREAT question to ask yourself and I'm glad Jen wrote this and made me think more about it. If goals aren't fun, they're not the right goals.

Syd - I agree that goals should be based in reality. It's important to set goals you can attain. After all, if you're working towards a fantasy, you're going to end up frustrated instead of having fun. Reality-based goals are the way to go -- and can still be fun!

Kaushik - That's such a great question. I love it! It really applies to this post and it can apply to life in general. I'm going to remember to ask myself that every once and awhile.

[Eric]

Great post Jen.

Doing something for yourself as a goal is important and part of that is that it's fun. If your goals and things you do aren't fun, why are you doing them?

Re-Tweeting now. :)