guest post: find positivity in negative situations

(♥) 

As a reminder, I'm on a business trip (oh what fun!) until January 18th. In the meantime, I have some great guest posts to share with you... The post below was written by Adrienne Carlson, who regularly writes on the topic of accelerated online degrees. Check out Accelerated Online Degree to learn more about what she does. I'll admit I don't know all that much about the site, but I do know that learning is pretty important -- and who doesn't like things that are accelerated? When you read the post below, you'll see why I chose to feature Adrienne as a guest author here today on Positively Present. Her article is a great one and really inspired me to look at negative situations differently! 

 

I’m a staunch believer in Murphy’s Law, and for those of you in the dark, it goes something like this – If anything can go wrong, it will. But, in what seems like a complete contradiction, I also believe that I am an eternal optimist. If you’re racking your brains as to how I can do both without coming across as a liar or someone mentally unstable, then you’ve probably never seen positive shades in negative situations. My view of life is simple – be prepared for the worst and the worst will turn out to become the best. That’s how you turn something negative into something rewarding and positive. So if you want to uplift the quality of your life and make it more fulfilling, here’s how you can find positivity in negative situations.

 

• Be proactive, not reactive: When something goes wrong, instead of spending all your time complaining about what has happened, channel your energy towards thinking of how you can put things right. When you avoid reacting to the situation like most people would and instead begin to work out the finer details of what you could do to set things right, you gain a multitude of advantages – one, you are trying to turn positive something that is negative; two, your mind is free of the stress that is associated with things going wrong and is instead involved in the creative task of thinking and planning alternatives; and three, you’re the man or woman of the moment because you don’t panic and are seen as someone who turn around any adverse situation and put a positive spin on things.   

 

• Look at the big picture: Very often, we tend to miss the forest for the trees, especially when things go wrong. It may only be a small problem, but if we fail to see it as just that, we tend to get worked up and stressed out and ruin our health in the process. When something untoward happens, play down the negative effects and think of all the positive things about the situation. For example, when you’re confronted with the news of a loved one’s illness, instead of brooding over it, console yourself with the fact that it is not news of death. By focusing on the larger picture, we can turn around negative situations and make them more positive.

 

• Remember that the situation is temporary: When something bothers me enough to affect my concentration and disrupt my daily routine, I calm myself down with these words – This too shall pass. Any situation, good or bad, is never permanent. It keeps changing, mostly according to your perception of the problem and your attitude in dealing with it. So when you feel yourself stressing out over a negative situation, take a deep breath and tell yourself that it will pass and that good times are just around the corner. This way, you stay positive and are able to focus on what is current and important instead of dwelling on the problem and ruining your regular life.

 

Remember, positive or negative, it’s all in your mind. And it’s up to you to decide which attitude you want to adopt.

 

This guest article was written by Adrienne Carlson, who regularly writes on the topic of accelerated online degree. Adrienne welcomes your comments and questions at her email address: adrienne.carlson1@gmail.com.

 

Comments

[Steven]

Very good points, when I first read Richard Bandler's powerful book "Reframing" I had no idea that I could transform the meaning of my negative (and sometimes quite traumatic) memories. Now when something really bad happens to me I realize that it HAD to happen to me - there was something in that experience that I had to learn from.

Also my "quote of the week" on my desk is relevant too, "Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit." - Napoleon Hill.

This is really important stuff. Thanks for sharing Adrienne!

[Sami - Life, Laughs & Lemmings]

This post reminds me of a time when my partner and I found out that about the only thing holding our car together was dust. Essentially we'd been sold a bomb. Our first reaction was anger but after awhile we accepted the situation and decided to write a list of the positives that came out of it (ie vowing to never, ever buy another car without first getting an inspection). We still had to deal with the bomby car but at least we could see the positive side (and laugh about it).

[Steve@Life Change for You]

I agree that life is not predictable, nor does it always turn out the way you want. That's why we have positive thinking!

[Josten]

I believe in what you said about dealing with situations. That we must learn to adapt and change to better fit our circumstances.

[Armen Shirvanian]

Hi Adrienne.

You're right about not being reactive. Whenever I see myself being reactive, I know I am not in control at that period of time. You won't see a leader start having to react to everything that is going on. At leader runs the show with effort, and nothing can derail them.

Effort is the key to staying in that favorable position. Without effort being put out, any of us would end up in reactionary mode, wondering why the world is so hard on us. It is a defensive mode where we are then less able to provide something.

Reactionary situations sure are temporary when we see them and make a change of some sort.

[All Women Stalker]

I always tell myself: what doesn't kill you makes you strong. :)