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the best self-love resources

Self-love-
  

This post is part of Just Love Yourself Month, an exciting new addition to the Positively Present! This month of self-love is inspired by my new workbook, Loving Your Self, which was designed to empower and inspire self-love. Learn more (and pick up your copy!) here

 

It's the end of Just Love Yourself Month here at Positively Present, and all month long we've been talking about the best ways to embrace self-love. Loving yourself can be a really big challenge, no matter who you are, so I wanted to end the month with a round-up of resources to help you whenever you feel like you're struggling in the self-love department. 

Curated from my own self-love journey and some serious self-love research, the list below includes websites, books, e-books, courses, articles (and more!) that have helped me or could help you experience more self-love in my life. It's a lot of information, but I hope you'll come back to it any time you're in need of a self-love boost! 

 

WEBSITES

Danielle LaPorte : a self-loving guru's amazing advice

Tiny Buddha : self-love (and life!) inspiration

Anastasia Amour : no bullshit body image advice

Hiya Tootsie : bold inspiration for out-of-the-box dreaming

The Pep Talk Generator : a perfect pick-me-up site

Abundance Tapestry : great self-love articles and more

Operation Beautiful : put an end negative self-talk

Self Compassion : learn to embrace compassion

Madly In Love With Me : a resource reclaiming self-love 

Self-Esteem Project : Dove's mission to improve self-esteem

 

BOOKS

Loving What Is : a life-changing book on acceptance

The Desire Map : a book for creating meaningful goals

How to Love Yourself : a guide for getting started on self-love

Reform Your Inner Mean Girl : end the self-bullying

Madly in Love with Me : how to become your own best friend

Art Doodle Love : a creative journal for self-discovery

The Self-Esteem Workbook : use this to find your awesomeness

Boundaries : a book for setting healthy boundaries

Tiny Buddha's Guide to Loving Yourself : a book of self-love wisdom

Inside Out : a new book from Anastasia Amour in November

Learning to Love Yourself : a workbook for unconditional self-love

The Gifts of Imperfection : a book for embracing who you are

Spirit Junkie : a book for radical self-love and miracles

Love Yourself, Heal Your Life : a must-read self-love tome

Choosing Me Before We : learn to put yourself first

Love Who You Are : a little book of self-love inspiration

 

EBOOKS

Loving Your Self : a workbook for increasing self-love

Finding Your Self : a workbook for soul-searching self-discovery 

21-Day Self-Love Challenge : use this to create a habit of self-love

The ABCs of Self-Love : e-book inspiration for loving yourself

Self-Compassion : a guide for mindful compassion and self-love

Desire Map Workbook : a digital workbook for self-searching

 

COURSES / ETC. 

Radical Self-Love Letters : self-love delivered right to your in-box

Pinterest / Love Yourself : my on-going round-up of self-love

The Self-Esteem Course : a 12-week self-esteem booster

Radical Self-Love Bible School : I did this and loved it

Self-Love Bootcamp : get yourself in self-loving gear

The Self Love Revolution : an 8-week course on self-worth

Desire Map Graphic Maker : pretty images of what you want

Truthbomb Card Deck : these cards are so self-love inspiring

Everyday Self-Love : a course to help build daily self-love 

The Fierce Love Course : for activating your best self

Free (!) Self-Confidence Course : a self-esteem booster 

Unlock Your Courage Toolkit : another great, free resource

Self-Love Reminders : a free printable I created years ago

  

ARTICLES

Speak Positively about Yourself : with a downloadable list of inspiring words

10 Easy Ways to Love Yourself More Today : start self-love now

Are You Who You Want to Be? : plus a free permission slip printable!

Self-Love Quotes : get inspired with these GoodReads quotes

55 Ways to Love Your Gorgeous Self : so many self-love tips here

Simple Ways to Love Yourself Again : if you've lost that lovin' feeling

How to Respect Yourself : don't ever settle for less than the best

(Self) Love is a Battlefield : an inspiring read on self-love

30 Ways to Love Yourself : an excellent round-up of tips

How to Embrace Imperfections : 4 great tips for acceptance

100 Questions : discover more about you with this Q&A

Positively Present / Self-Love : a collection of all my self-love posts

 

It's my sincerest hope that this round of books, inspiration, articles, etc. will help you on your own self-love journey. Self-love is such an important aspect of living a positive, present life, but most of us live in societies that work hard to prevent us from truly loving who we are. If we want self-love, we have to work for it and keep working on it every single day.

If you know of any great self-love resources, please feel free to leave them in the comments section below and I'll try to add them to this list!   


positively present picks: september 25, 2015

Fall
Source

 

Quote-of-the-week

"Fall has always been my favorite season.
The time when everything bursts with its last beauty,
as if nature had been saving up all year for the grand finale."

Lauren DeStefano

 

Links-I-Love

Autumn Obsession : in case you didn't know... I love autumn!

Book-Related Questions for Me? : visit my Ask the Author page and ask away

4 Recommendations from Positive Psychology : all 4 are so important

DesignLoveFest Cell Phone Cases : these are all so pretty

Loving Your Self : wow! this is my most popular workbook! thanks!
Get your copy + increase your self love right here

6 Secrets to a Better Love Life : great positive tips in this article

When We Hold onto Relationships that Hurt Us : and read this too

99 of the Best Things in the World : this list made me smile

Things Happy People Never Forget : keep these five things in mind

Mental Minimalism : I love this concept of mental less

55 Ways to Love Your Gorgeous Self Now : yes! tons of self-love!

Constellations Case : lovin' this phone case on Society6

No Regrets : you won't regret putting the phone down + living

7 Styles of Decision Making : very interesting to think about

How Negative Thinking Changes Your Brain : whoa. powerful. 

No Makes Way for Yes : there is power in the word "no"

Self-Discovery Tools : check out my favorites on The Girl Who Knows

 

Listening

Listen to this playlist on YouTube.

"Stay for the Night" — Luhx
"What Do You Mean?" (cover) — Mackenzie Johnson
"Music to Watch Boys To" — Lana Del Ray
"Today's the Day" — P!nk
"Roman Holiday" — Halsey
"Bite"— Troye Sivan
"Wildfire" — The Mynabirds
"On My Mind" — Ellie Goulding
"Thoughts" — Simen Mitlid
"Smile" (Cover) — Lana Del Ray

 

Reading

Check out my reading list on GoodReads.
 

All That Is
James Salter

In Progress:
See Inside a Lettering Artist's Sketchbook
and Process, from Pencil to Vector

Jessica Hische

Spinster:
Making a Life of One's Own

Kate Bolick

 

I wrote a book too! Check it out...

The Positively Present Guide to Life
Dani DiPirro


JLY month : 100 questions to discover yourself

Questions-Answers

This post is part of Just Love Yourself Month, an exciting new addition to the Positively Present! This month of self-love is inspired by my new workbook, Loving Your Self, which was designed to empower and inspire self-love. Learn more (and pick up your copy!) here.  This post is also part of the 2015 Word of the Month series, based on the monthly theme featured in the Every Day Matters 2015 Diary I designed for Watkins Publishing. In the planner, each month has a theme highlighted in the weekly illustrations, quotes, and activities. This month's theme is LEARN. (Order your 2016 Diary here!) 

 

If someone asked you, "Do you know who you are?" you'd probably quickly respond with, "Yes, of course I do!" We all know ourselves to some extent, but we're always growing and changing and, as a result, sometimes we're not really paying attention to who we are and what matters most to us. We're often to busy to worry about questioning the essence of who we are (or, in some cases, we don't necessary want to take the time to figure it out), but understanding yourself — learning about who you are — is an important part of loving yourself. 

Of course, like so many worthwhile pursuits, this isn't a simple task. Learning about yourself isn't something you can do in an afternoon. Who You Are isn't a book you can pull off the shelf and skim through for answers. (Well, it probably is a book title, but not a book written about you and what it means to be you.) Learning about yourself takes time and interest and dedication. It also takes overcoming the notion that such an act would be self-indulgent and maybe even selfish. 

Self-knowledge is a stepping stone to self-love. And self-love is not selfish

How, you might be wondering, does one go about attaining this self-knowledge? The trick is to remember that you already have all of the information — it's within you! — but you have to access it. And that's the tricky part. For me, I've found the best way to become more knowledgable about myself is to engage in activities that make me think about what I value, what I like, and what I dislike. (Inspired by this, I created two workbooks that are great resources for self-knowledge: Finding Your Self and Loving Your Self.) In addition to activities like the ones found in these workbooks, I've found that answering questions is one of the best ways to uncover self-knowledge. 

Do you remember those emails and IMs that people used to send around back in the day? They were filled with a list of questions, things like: Do you have a crush on someone right now? Pepsi or Coke? Have you ever been drink? What's your favorite color? They were silly little questionnaires, but for some reason, I always enjoyed answering the questions, even I only answered them in my head and didn't type my replies on the screen. I realize now that answering these questions was a way to better understand myself (albeit on a very basic level). The questions prompted me to think about what was going on in my life, as well as my likes and dislikes. 

Lately I've seen a resurgence of these questions on Tumblr. It makes me think that, no matter what the media, teens will find a way to use silly questionnaires to connect with one another and tune in to what matters to them. As I've been scrolling through my dashboard and these lists of questions come up, I find myself reading through them and mentally replying, just like I did when I was younger. Even if the questions aren't all that meaningful, somehow the answers are. They provide an outlet for self-connection and inner knowledge. Plus, it's kinda just fun. 

As silly as these little Q&A posts are, I've found myself really enjoying them and realized that, even as an adult, they allow me to learn things about myself and think about topics I might not have given much thought to before. I've created a list of some questions — some thought-provoking, some less so — to prompt you to think about who you are and what matters to you. 

You can scan them briefly and think about quick, one-word replies, or you can print them out (see below for the PDF version), print them out, and spend some time really thinking about the answers. Either way, they're bound to make you think and provide you with some fresh insights on what it means to be you. 

  1. Are you generally optimistic or pessimistic? 
  2. What would you change about yourself if you could?
  3. What apps do you use most often?
  4. What's the nicest compliment you've ever received?
  5. If you were a color, what would you be?
  6. What three things could you not live without?
  7. What was the last argument you had about?
  8. How did you meet your best friend?
  9. Do you have any collections?
  10. What would you never want to change? 
  11. What are your favorite words?
  12. Do you think everything will work out for the best?
  13. Who did you last say "I love you" to?
  14. What word (or sound) makes you cringe?
  15. Do you always finish work on time?
  16. Where did you take your first vacation?
  17. Would you be described as spontaneous?
  18. Do you read your horoscope?
  19. If you could be an emoji, what would you be?
  20. How do you react to criticism?
  21. Would you rather be too hot or too cold?
  22. Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?
  23. How long does it take you to get ready? 
  24. Do you have a good relationship with your parents?
  25. Is there someone that you miss?
  26. Do you regret anything you've done?
  27. Would you live in a book/film if you could?
  28. How would you prefer to die?
  29. What do you think people notice about your first?
  30. Who knows you better than anyone?
  31. What one word describes how you're feeling right now?
  32. Are you often early, on time, or late?
  33. What scares you the most?
  34. Would you go back in time if you could?
  35. Do you believe in yourself?
  36. When was the last time you had a passionate kiss?
  37. Is it easier for you to forgive or to forget?
  38. Who is the most intelligent person you know?
  39. What was/is your best school subject?
  40. What's the most important quality in a partner?
  41. Are you in love right now?
  42. Have you ever broken someone’s heart?
  43. Do you enjoy playing board or video games?
  44. Who cares a lot about you?
  45. How would you spend a million dollars?
  46. What was the last dream you can recall about?
  47. Who was the last person who saw you cry?
  48. Do you give second chances?
  49. What's the last thing you did before bed last night?
  50. Which was the best year of your life?
  51. How do you feel about being naked?
  52. Do you believe everything happens for a reason?
  53. Could you live as a hermit?
  54. Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?
  55. How do you feel when you wake up?
  56. Is dishonesty ever okay?
  57. Do you believe in love at first sight?
  58. What's your current relationship status?
  59. Are you religious? Spiritual?
  60. Who did you last have a deep conversation with?
  61. Do you like your name and/or nickname?
  62. To get to know you, what should someone read, watch, or listen to?
  63. What qualities do you admire in others? 
  64. How would you spend your ideal day?
  65. What five things do you spend the most time doing?
  66. What is the last song you heard?
  67. When did you last laugh really, really hard?
  68. Do you feel your outside appearance fairly represents the real you?
  69. What is one of your favorite quotes?
  70. If you could live anywhere, where would you live?
  71. What's the nicest thing you've ever done?
  72. Do you wish on stars, lucky numbers, eyelashes?
  73. What's your biggest pet peeve?
  74. How did you celebrate your last birthday?
  75. What age have you most enjoyed being?
  76. Why do you love your favorite author or musician?
  77. How do you feel about technology?
  78. What season brings you the most joy?
  79. Do you consider yourself detail-oriented?
  80. What TV show did you like best as a kid?
  81. Would you rather give a gift or receive a gift?
  82. Do often make jokes? 
  83. When did you last make a new friend?
  84. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
  85. Are you looking forward to something right now?
  86. Which website do you visit most often?
  87. Do you match the traits of your zodiac sign?
  88. Are you afraid of the dark?
  89. What is the most trouble you've gotten into?
  90. If you could tell your younger self one thing, what would it be?
  91. Would you rather give up TV or the internet?
  92. Have you changed a lot in the last decade?
  93. If you could have any talent, what would it be?
  94. What's the most painful loss you've experienced?
  95. When were you last embarrassed?
  96. Would you like to be famous? 
  97. Do you often sing in the shower?
  98. If you could see your future, would you want to?
  99. What is your earliest memory?
  100. What are you most grateful for in your life?

  100-Questions

 

As I created these questions, I couldn't help but answer them myself and I found some of the answers pretty eye-opening. I hope that they've inspired you to think about what it means to have knowledge of yourself, and I hope you've gained some insights from these questions that you can carry with you as continue to learn more about who you are! 

 

Loving-Your-Self

Want to empower yourself with some serious self-love? Start loving yourself (or increase the love you already have for yourself!) with the inspiration and motivation found in Loving Your Self: An Empowering Workbook for Increasing Self-LoveFilled with uplifting encouragement, thought-provoking questions, and engaging exercises, Loving Your Self is an essential tool for mastering the art of self-love. Learn more about the workbook here and purchase your own copy here.


positively present picks: september 18, 2015

Leaves
Source

 

Quote-of-the-week

"Love yourself so much that when
someone treats you wrong, you recognize it."

Rena Rose

 

Links-I-Love

Loving Your Self : wow! this is my most popular workbook! thanks!
Get your copy + increase your self love right here

How to Transform Self-Criticism into Self-Appreciation : yes yes yes

25 Quotes to Quiet the Negative Voice in Your Head : focus on the good

Elizabeth Pawle : such beautiful + brightly colored art

Love Yourself : a collection of self-love inspiration on Pinterest

Do You Think with Your Head or Your Heart? : take this quiz + find out

Best Version of Myself : a perfect little self-love sweatshirt

5 Secrets to a Happy Morning : start every day off on the right foot

Embrace Love + Life with Gratitude : check out these 17 tips

Teabook : a monthly subscription for tea? yes please!

Obama Singing "I Can't Feel My Face" : this made me laugh :)

Tumblr Timeso into Tumblr right now. check it out!

Structure Minerals : so many pretty crystals (and look at this)

The Joy of Mindful Learning : patience is so key here

 

Listening

Listen to this playlist on YouTube.

"Wild" — Troye Sivan
"Soap" — Melanie Martinez
"Run to the Mountain" — Nate Heller
"No Light, No Light" — Florence + the Machine
"Haunting"— Halsey
"Drifting" — Nate Eiesland
"The Woods" — Hollow Coves
"Salt" — B. Miles
"Like a River Runs" — Bleachers
"Fire and Flood" (Cover) — Ashton Kate

 

Reading

Check out my reading list on GoodReads.
 

Tell the Wolves I'm Home
Carol Rifka Brunt

I Need Your Love - Is That True?:
How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation
and Start Finding Them Instead

Byron Katie

 

I wrote a book too! Check it out...

The Positively Present Guide to Life
Dani DiPirro


JLY month : how to love your mind + a giveaway!

What-You-Think

This post is part of Just Love Yourself Month, an exciting new addition to the Positively Present! This month of self-love is inspired by my new workbook, Loving Your Self, which was designed to empower and inspire self-love. Learn more (and pick up your copy!) here

 

One of the topics I discuss in detail in my Loving Your Self workbook is how to love your mind. The thoughts you have create the life you live so it's important to direct thoughts to a positive, productive place. Learning to create a loving mindset (and loving your mind even when it isn't so positive) is an essential aspect of self-love. How you think — and speak — about yourself is vital to creating a love of who you are. Positive thoughts and words impact your mental, physical, and emotional health in a big way. One of my favorite quotes goes something like this: “If you realized how important your thoughts are, you’d never think another negative thought.” What you think about shapes your world and, in particular, it shapes who you are.

Your mind is the most powerful weapon you have when it comes to the battle of self-love. If used properly, it can be a tool for fighting off negativity and keeping self-depreciation at bay. Use it wisely and it can transform the way you see yourself — and the way you see the world. Your mind is always with you (hopefully!), and because of that, you always have the power to choose self-loving, kind thoughts.

Choosing a positive mindset can be a challenge, which is why I've rounded up some of the best ideas for loving your mind. 

 

KNOW WHAT TRIGGERS NEGATIVITY. 

Being aware of what triggers negative or unloving thoughts won’t remove the thoughts, but having awareness of people, places, or situations that invoke negative thinking gives you a chance to challenge the thoughts with positivity. Knowing what triggers negative or self-deprecating thoughts also gives you an opportunity to avoid these people, situations, or environments. The more you're able to be aware of and address negative thoughts, the more power you'll have over your mind. And the more in control you feel when it comes to your mental state, the easier it is to love and accept your mind. 

 

BE AWARE OF THE WORDS "I AM." 

With the words “I am,” you define yourself to the world. Those two little words have a big impact when you state them (both to yourself and to others). They are concrete and, when used honestly, a valuable definition of who you are. Become aware of what you say (or think) you are. The thoughts you have about how you define yourself have a major impact on how you think, feel, and interact. When you pay attention to what you think you are, you'll either realize that you're not, in fact, those things or you'll confirm that you are absolutely able to say "I am [fill in the blank." Either way, the awareness helps you create a deeper acceptance of your thoughts and your self. 

 

STAY IN THE PRESENT MOMENT. 

So much of the negativity and stress in our minds comes from worrying about what has happened or fretting about what could be. Create a more peaceful place for your thoughts by doing your best to stay in the moment. Remember this: the past is over and the future is fiction. The more you remind yourself of this, the more likely you'll be to stay in the moment. You'll realize that what matters most is what's happening right now and that's the stuff that deserves your mind's attention. Whenever you find your mind in a place that you don't want it to be, bring it back to the now and see if you can ground it in the present. 

 

PLAY SOME MIND GAMES. 

The mind is one of your most important tools and, like any tool, it needs to be cared for. You can do your best to keep your mind in a positive place, but that's not going to do much good if your mind isn't in good shape. Exercise your mind the way you would your body by trying new things, playing thought-provoking games (go old school with things like Scrabble or check out some popular apps like Lumosity). The important thing is to get your mind thinking in new ways, challenging it a little bit. The more your stretch your brain muscles, the stronger your mind will get. 

 

FIND + USE POSITIVE RESOURCES. 

Think, for a moment, about the things you read and watch and listen to. Are these things (the books, the magazines, the shows, the radio stations and podcasts) positively impacting your mind and helping it to grow and learn? There's nothing wrong with binge-watching a trashy reality TV show now and then, but it's important to pay attention to what you're feeding your mind. Are you giving it nutritious content that will help it flourish? Or are you feeding it only junk food? One of the best things you can do is feed your mind healthy, positive content. Read inspiring books, pick up a motivating magazine (see below for how you can win a subscription to a great one!), watch a fascinating documentary. Do what you can to provide your mind with positive resources!

  


WIN A SUBSCRIPTION TO LIVE HAPPY MAGAZINE
!Live-Happy-Cover

I'm offering one lucky guy or gal a chance to win something that definitely brings me some happy moments: a one-year subscription (six issues) to Live Happy Magazine! This magazine weaves the science of positive psychology through inspiring features, relatable stories, and sage advice to help people discover their personal journey of happiness in life, at work, and at home. Every time I read it, I feel more inspired and uplifted and I'm sure you will too! See below for details on how to enter this giveaway! 
 

HOW TO ENTER

1. Enter by doing one (or all!) of the following. Each counts as an entry.   

    * Friend PositivelyPresent on Facebook
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    * Link to this post on any social media outlet

2. Leave a comment below, including:

    * Where / how you entered (every follow / like / tweet / etc. counts!)
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IMPORTANT DETAILS

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