Previous month:
December 2016
Next month:
February 2017

Positively Present Picks : January 20, 2017

 
Being You


Quote-of-the-week

“There comes a moment you have to decide:
Do you keep quiet or do you stand up.”

Malala Yousafzai

 

Links-I-Love    
The Mastery Journal : I love a good journal + this looks great! 

10 Ways to Start the Year Out Right : not too late to make it awesome

What's Stopping You? : simple, thought-provoking questions

Productivity in Terrible Times : how to keep making progress

3 Strategies to Boost Confidence : 'cause confidence changes everything

Women's Protest Signs : download + print all of these great signs

10 Healthy Foods that Fight Stress : I definitely need to eat more of these

The Moral Arc of the Universe : and all the things it bends toward

What's Your Happiness Recipe? : here's advice for creating one

20 Easy Ways to Add Self-Love Today : no better time than the present!

The Four Agreements : a guide to personal freedom (get the book here)

A Positive Attitude : it really is the world's best kept secret to success

Why Women Drink : a very powerful take on women + alcohol

Future Is Female : all of my favorite feminist things in one spot :)

Mindful Munching : how to each better and more mindfully everyday

What It's Like to Go Without Complaining for a Month : powerful!

 

Listening

Listen to this playlist on YouTube.
Finally on Spotify! Follow me!


"Wide Awake" — Katy Perry
"Body of Work" — The Mynabirds
"This Is What Makes Us Girls" — Lana Del Ray
"Sit Still Look Pretty" — Daya
"Love Myself" — Hailee Steinfeld
"Respect"— Aretha Franklin
"Better" —Meghan Trainor
"Yes Girl" — Bea Miller
"Not a Pretty Girl" — Ani DiFranco
"Talkin' Bout a Revolution" — Tracy Chapman

 

Reading

Check out my reading list on GoodReads.
 

The Animators
Kayla Rae Whitaker

The Corrections
Johnathan Franzen
 

I write books too! Check it out...

The Positively Present Guide to Life*

Effortless Inspiration Series:
Gratitude, Living in the Moment, 
Compassion, and Forgiveness*

Stay Positive: Daily Reminders
from Positively Present*
 

Some links may be affiliate links. If you click on them and purchase something, I receive a commission. There is no additional cost to you if you use these links, and I will never share links for products I haven't or wouldn't purchase myself. For more information on affiliate links, please visit the Terms of Use page. 


5 Tactics for Coping with a Meltdown

  Okay

 

Did anyone else have an existential crisis, freak-the-hell-out meltdown last week or was it just me? 

It was sure a rough week for me, personally and professionally, and, though I wanted to curl up on the couch and escape the world with a book (really loving The Animators right now!), I knew this was a perfect time to put the words I write each week into practice. I knew I had the tools to figure out a way to make the most of things, even though I was feeling pretty helpless, so decided to give them a shot. Here's what I did to cope this week. Hopefully these tips will help you if you're feeling meltdown-y, too. 

 

CRY IT OUT

Like most adults, I'm not a big crier. Crying is generally reserved for heartbreak or loss (or seeing roadkill on the side of the road -- if there's any sort of animal death/pain, I will cry), but this week I had a good ol' cry. I'm talking about the shoulder-shaking, sobbing-like-your-pet-just-died kind of cry, the snotty, ugly cry that necessitates more than one nose-blowing after you're done. It wasn't pretty, but it actually felt good.

Most of the problems I'm currently facing aren't new; I've just been avoiding them for so long that it felt good to acknowledge to myself (in the form of tears) that things aren't going well. It's unpleasant, but acknowledgment is the first a step on the path to making things better. I'm certainly not going to cry every time something goes wrong, but this week I really took note of how good to feels to physically feel your pain and release it in a way that, even though it hurts, ultimately feels good. 

 

TALK IT OUT

After I allowed myself that cry (and, yes, it was an allowance -- so many times I want to cry, but I don't because it tell myself it's a waste of time or insist to myself that I should strong), I decided to open up a bit and talk it out. Usually when things aren't going well -- especially professionally -- I tend not to talk about it with anyone else. One of the downsides of running your own business is that it's somewhat an extension of you in a way that doesn't happen with other jobs. If my business is failing, it feels like I'm failing as a person.

I'm sure others feel this way about their work, too, but there's something about running the show (and being the sole performer in the show!) that makes the professional deeply personal. So I generally keep it to myself when there's trouble, and do my best to find a way to work it out. But this week I decided to open up a bit more, sharing my struggles with friends (and now with you, in a way!). None of the talking resulted in immediate solutions or major a-ha moments, but it felt good to open up, to get feedback, and to not keep everything in my own head. 

 

DANCE IT OUT

Okay, this one might be a personal preference, but when I'm feeling low, one of my go-to moves is to put on a great, upbeat song and have a little dance party by myself in my apartment. (Putting that in writing, I'm now wondering if that's an odd thing to do, but I'm pretty sure I can't be the only one who does that, right? Also, by "dancing," I mean "awkward flailing that usually scares my pup, ha!) If you don't like dancing or listening to uplifting music, I bet there's something that instantly puts you in a positive mood, no matter how low you're feeling. 

Post-cry-session, I decided I was going to flip the mood by turning on the songs I'm loving and getting moving. (Exercising probably does the same thing, getting those endorphins going!) Of course, this doesn't solve any of my problems, but it certainly improves my mood, putting me in a more level-headed state where I can make more positive decisions. I decided to make a little playlist for you, if you're feeling like you need to dance it out. Find Dani's Dance Party here on YouTube

 

LAUGH IT OUT

Laughter, for me, really is the best medicine. Watching something hilarious has always been one my best strategies for coping with pain, and this week it served me really well. I spent a lot of time seeking out things that made me laugh -- silly YouTube videos, comedy specials on Netflix, funny friends. Like dancing, laughing doesn't really fix anything, but it does shift your mindset from pain to pleasure, and in that more positive state, I feel like my thinking is clearer. 

Apparently, laughter decreases stress hormones, increases immune cells and triggers the release of endorphins, which promote an overall sense of well-being and even temporarily relieve pain. So, even though laughing might seem frivolous, it has some major physical and psychological benefits, all of which can help a great deal when it comes to having a mental meltdown. 

 

WORK IT OUT

Once I got through some of the emotional stages of my meltdown, it was time to get to work. If things aren't going well and they're within your control (unlike, say, the loss of a loved one -- though any sort of emotional reaction to that is more about the pain of loss than it is about meltdown), it's up to you to take action to make things better. Having a meltdown is cathartic and all, but if you don't use that emotional freakout as a catalyst for change, it won't be long before you find yourself again in Meltdown Town. 

So I got out my laptop and I got to work on planning how I'm going to fix the multiple messes I've found myself in. These aren't the kinds of things that'll be fixed over night, but they'll never be fixed if I don't start trying to repair them. It felt good to admit to the problems, to feel them, and to start taking positive steps to rectifying them. There's still pain and I know it goes deep because I'm currently shaking off a horrific nightmare that was so obviously, perfectly symbolic that I woke both scared of and impressed by my own mind. But I'm ready to make progress now. And, really, isn't that what a meltdown is for, to shake us up, to get us to pay attention to what's not working so we can transform it to something that is? 

 

As I was finalizing this post, I heard Shonda Rhimes' voice coming from my TV screen. She said, "The idea that there's suddenly no plan is breathtaking in its terror." That sentence so adequately describes how I'm feeling right now. It's a terrifying place to be, but terror is freeing in a way. When nothing is determined, anything can happen. It's tempting, when plan-less, to imagine the worst, but if anything can happen, then that means amazing things can happen, too. 

  

PPGTL-Footer Love-Self-Footer Find-Self-Footer Stickers-Footer


 

 


Positively Present Picks : January 13, 2017

 
Understand


Quote-of-the-week

"Everything that irritates us about others
can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." 

C.G. Jung

 

Links-I-Love    
Eternal Optimist Talking Points for 2017 : love these!!

The Danger of Silence : speaking up creates safety

Chasing Slow : Pop and Banter's interview with Erin

Judging Others : the truth behind it + why we do it

5 Barriers to Success : essential thing to avoid for success

All of My Failures Can be Traced to Silence : again, speak up!

Be Optimistic : this enamel sign is simple + inspiring (this too)

Color Wheel Blanket : any designer would love this

6 Questions to Help You Love Yourself : even when it's so hard

Building a Healthier You : Free People's 10 step list is A+

Powerful Ways to Work Through Fear : you can do it!!

Small Room : a simple -- but so powerful -- quote

Rethinking the Winter Blues : winter has a silver lining

10 Ways to Return to Peacefulness : we all need more peace

Body Positivity x Social Media : very important to consider

 

Listening

Listen to this playlist on YouTube.
Finally on Spotify! Follow me!


"Castle on the Hill" — Ed Sheeran
"I Want It All" — Natalie Taylor
"Crash" — Trella
"Next Life" — Souls
"Trouble" — Cage the Elephant
"Break"— North Elements
"Shape of You" —Ed Sheeran
"Mania" — Keenan O'Meara
"Me Myself & I" — G-Eazy
"Leave Your Lover" — Echos

 

Reading

Check out my reading list on GoodReads.
 

The Animators
Kayla Rae Whitaker

The 50 States: Explore the USA
Gabrielle Balkan
 

I write books too! Check it out...

The Positively Present Guide to Life*

Effortless Inspiration Series:
Gratitude, Living in the Moment, 
Compassion, and Forgiveness*

Stay Positive: Daily Reminders
from Positively Present*
 

Some links may be affiliate links. If you click on them and purchase something, I receive a commission. There is no additional cost to you if you use these links, and I will never share links for products I haven't or wouldn't purchase myself. For more information on affiliate links, please visit the Terms of Use page.